Brings new meaning to "Fragile, Handle with Care"
That foreigner May 16, 2009
I know I am “that foreigner.” You know, the one that people talk about as I walk or drive past. I know I look different in the way I walk, hold myself, make eye contact or don’t make eye contact with people. And I especially know it when I go somewhere with Jadyn.
We are starred at everywhere we go. And I do mean everywhere. Heads turn as we pass by. People say “Look at the Chinese baby with the white mommy.” Not in an unkind way, but an intensely curious way.
Tonight, when I went to church, my friend De stopped me briefly and told me that a neighbor in her area asked about me. This is a little funny because I live pretty far from where she does but I drive down her road 2 days a week to take Jadyn to preschool. The neighbor asked De if she knew “that foreign woman” who smiles all the time. Have I told you that Albanians do NOT smile until you smile at them or greet them? You would think they were the most unfriendly people! This is not at all true but NO ONE smiles until you smile at them or greet them.
But the best part was that she said to De, “She has a beautiful daughter but her eyes are slanted and she doesn’t look like her mother.”
De smiled and replied, “Well they have adopted her from China.”
Her neighbor replied, “Well, that is so nice that China would give her to them.”
It is not quite that simple, I know, but I agree.
Bread and Butter April 2, 2009
Yesterday, Linda and I were outside talk with my neighbor Bona. It was Jadyn’s birthday and we were of course making a big fuss about how big she is, how smart she is, how beautiful she is… you get the idea. About once or twice a week, I allow Jadyn to go next door with Uendi (Wendi) to play. She LOVES to play at Uendi’s house. Bona was telling Linda and I that the day before yesterday, she ate 5 pieces of bread with butter!
“Five pieces!” I exclaimed. “Why did you let her do that?”
“Well, she just kept asking me and asking me.” Bona replied.
I laughed and said “Oh Bona, you are like a grandma! You can not allow her to eat so much. You must say no.”
You may remember that I have had many challenges getting Linda to tell Jadyn no.
“Oh Bona,” Linda said, “Jenny says Jadyn can have only 1 piece of bread, no more. When I tell her ‘No more, Jadyn,’ and she says ‘Please, Linda, me shume (more),’ I say, ‘No, Jadyn. Stop. Mommy said no more.’ Then she says okay and goes off to play. When she asks for more, tell her no. She doesn’t obey me, but she obeys her mommy.”
Who have I trained more effectively? Linda or Jadyn?
What do Coke, lemons and coffee have in common? March 9, 2009
I sent the boys off to the store tonight to pick up 5 bottles of soda before we had our youth volunteers over for pizza. This was about an hour before the meeting and I was doing some last minute pick up and trying to get to the shower after a long day of painting and house projects. I was gathering the last load of clothes from the laundry room to take up stairs and I turned around to find a strange woman in my entry way carrying 5- 1.5 liters bottles of soda. Both of the boys are behind her.
The boys had apparently been struggling to get their full load back to the house (it’s less than 50 yards to the store) so she carried them for them. I thanked her several times and on her way out she noticed my bag of lemons outside the door. We pruned the lemon tree last week and picked about 4 dozen lemons from the limbs we took down. I have been giving them away ever since.
“Just one piece.” she tells me as she takes one.
“Take several! Please,we have so many!” She does.
I reach out to shake her hand thanking her again for helping the boys and she leans forward to kiss both my cheeks.
“Let’s have coffee,” she says.
“Yes, lets.” I agree.
She departs quickly and I realize I did not ask her name.
A stranger, soon to be friend, will be coming for coffee. Who knows when.
That, in a nutshell, is life in Albania.
Meet a stranger…give her a lemon….have a coffee… friend for life.
The one about New Year’s Eve January 19, 2009
Our New Year’s Eve day was full. We got up in the morning (not early, mind you… we are on vacation) and took a trek up Mount Dajti. This is the local mountain which has a gondola you can ride to the top. There is a playground, coffee shop, lookout over the city and a number or restaurants. (To read about one of our early Mt. Dajti adventures from our third month in Albania click here.)
We took a Frisbee and a ball so we would be able to enjoy the wide open spaces and mountain air and bundled up for the cold. But we found plenty to do between the playground, lookout and SNOW!!
In the afternoon, I helped cook my neighbor’s turkey (their stove broke a few weeks ago).
This was after she spent a week in my freezer. At least I didn’t have to cut her head off and pluck her feathers. That might have put me over the edge.
Later that evening (after the hair episode) we gathered at Matt and Cindy’s (with the Watanabe’s and the Zollinger’s too!) for an evening of food and games while waiting for the fireworks at midnight.
ALL the kids stayed up for the fireworks which we watched from Matt and Cindy’s 4th floor balconies. Fireworks in Albania brings a whole new meaning to the word “DANGER” so we’ll give you a little peak. Unfortunately, I lost some of my videos from this year so this one is from last year when my mom and dad were here but you will get the idea. 
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
The one about the hair January 13, 2009
Well, I know you are anxiously awaiting the many posts I promised and I will indeed deliver. BUT first… I just have to share the one about the hair because it is too good to pass up.
As of Christmas, I had not cut my hair since we left the States in late August. I have two wonderful women who have cut my hair over the last 13 years in OK and CO. Charlene, who my husband tracked down in OKC, is the co-owner of Village Headquarters. By the time we met her she had already been cutting hair 20+ years. Needless to say she is a pro. In all the years she cut my hair, she never once hesitated –ever. And I ALWAYS walked away with a great cut or color. Deb in Colorado Springs has been cutting my mom’s hair for a few years and now, THANKFULLY, she squeezes me in whenever I come to town. She cuts my hair dry, which is a whole new experience, but again, I have always walked away happy.
So now we come to Albania…. and quickly you will see the dilemma in which I found myself. These two women (Charlene and Deb) cut and color in a week at least 3 TIMES the number of people the average salon might see here in a month. The sheer volume of hair that travels through a US Salon compared to an Albanian salon is just unthinkable. So there is a level of expertise… well, let’s get on with the story.
I FINALLY broke down and went on New Year’s Eve day to the salon in the apartment building down the street from me. I took my neighbor Denisa, who is 16, with me. She speaks great English and could help me with any words I was unsure of in the explanation process of what I wanted. I was terrified. I have heard more than one horror story from foreigners who went to an Albanian salon and walked away with their hair chopped butchered. I hoped I had waited until my hair was SO long that I would not be upset if it was cut shorter than I asked for.
I asked to have highlights and a long layered cut. My hair had grown way past my shoulders and I wanted it to touch my shoulders with a few long layers that would give me some bounce. She began with the color. So a few foils later I am getting a little concerned. There is not quite the level of precision. The foils are not all the way to my scalp…hmmm. I hang on and hope.
It was like a scene out of Steel Magnolias. You know the one where the women gather in the salon to tell all the latest gossip about everyone around town. The discussion centered on the woman who lived in the house where Denisa’s family now lives, and how she was much uglier than Denisa’ mother. Yikes! What will be said about me next week?
So my color is finally done and I am thinking it looks pretty good. She begins to cut. Over all I am pretty pleased. She seems to have a good system and technique although it seems to take forever. I have been here now for about 2 hours. Now she is going to blow my hair dry and style it. This is a 30 minute process. She takes each strand of hair and pulls it straight with the dryer and brush. After about 20 minutes of this there seems to be a short in the chord of the blow dryer. She shakes the dryer a bit and the chord sparks and then flickers. It is on fire! She drops the dryer and the circuit for the whole store blows and we are in the dark. And you never know in Albania we might have blown the circuit for the whole apartment building. Sheesh… After 15 minutes of chaos, Denisa finally suggests that her father has some experience with electricity and maybe he can help. He comes and FLIPS THE BREAKER (sigh) and we finally have lights back.
So my hair is done and now that I can see, there is indeed a final product with a few mishaps. I have a LINE in my hair from the color bleeding out of the foils. And no, it does blend it as it is HORIZONTAL (the picture does not do it justice), although later I was able to part my hair a little differently and cover it up. You can also see that the color does not come all the way to my roots. Is that to get me to come back sooner?!! She goes around my now dry hair and cleans up the stray hairs that are sticking out from my choppy layers (a little blending was needed…) and never mentions the line. Alas, I am finished. I pay my 1900 lek (about $20) and leave.
We stop at my neighbors house so Denisa’s mom can see the results. Her dad (the one who fixed the electricity) says I look like a zebra.
Yikes. Need I say more?
Things I have grown accustomed to… June 1, 2008
It is amazing what you can get used to…. here are just a few of the things that top my list from the last two years.
1. Cars passing me on the road with only inches to spare. I hardly flinch.
2. Cars honking behind me to get out of their way on narrow roads. I frequently ignore them and go on my way until there is a safe place to move over. This often happens when I am with Jadyn. I need a sign that says “wide load.” It has new meaning on our narrow streets!
3. Opening and shutting the windows and outer blinds on our house on a rotation system throughout the day. It is all based on where the sun is! In the early morning I can leave everything open until about 8:30 or 9:00. Then I have to shut all the upstairs windows and shades to try to keep the heat out. After 3:30 or so, the sun has moved enough for me to open everything back up (at least on one side of the house) and let the hot air out.
4. Closing all the downstairs windows at night so we don’t get stray cats inside looking for food. I am guarding my trash.
5. Sweeping up and endless supply of ants. Yes we have sprayed…… they must live somewhere very deep in the walls AND they can find the smallest morsel of food with in a 10 yard radius.
6. Enjoying crunchy towels that are hung to dry. Whey use the dryer in the summer and add to the heat? Great for exfoliation.
7. How to shake t-shirts just right before hanging them on the line so they don’t have any wrinkles. This works better with the kids clothes than Robert’s.
8. Short seasons of certain fruits. Strawberries came and went so fast we almost missed it. We will only see them again at very expensive prices in certain markets.
9. Turkish coffee… it is an experience one can not describe. I am anxious to fix it for those of you we will visit this summer! Read more about my Turkish coffee adventures tomorrow!
10. Sweating all day and smelling a wide variety of scents when I ride the bus or even meet people on the road. Can you say deoderant?
Adventures in eating out: Don’t leave the camera! October 9, 2006
Austin had a great day at school today. So we decided it was a celebration… we took the gondola to the top of Mount Dajti (pronounced die-tee). It was a beautiful day, a little on the chilly side, but there is a cafe and playground at the top so we thought it would be fun for everyone. We took a taxi to the base and rode the gondola to the top. It is quite a sight of Tirana. And there is no SMOG, our first fresh breath in a month! Unfortunately, the playground was torn down because they are moving it to another site on the property. There has been many improvements since we were there last November. There are also several restaurants that you got for dinner. These are about 1.5 miles from the top but there are free shuttle busses and drivers to take you there. So we were debating about dinner and what to do, when a man asked us in English if we were looking for a restaurant. Say no more… speak English and we get in the car with any strange man. He was the owner of a restaurant, Paradise. So, 1.5 miles down the bumpiest road you have ever traveled, to a quaint little place right on the side of the mountain. We could see all of Tirana and watch the sunset behind the city. It was great. The food… not so much. I think Robert enjoyed what he ordered. You order a main dish and that was all it was, no side dishes. So I ordered porkchops, and chicken fillet for the boys and that is what we got. Three porkchops and three chicken breast. There were not even any side dishes on the menu. The only other customers were three guys from Germany who are riding around Europe on their motorcycles. And the background music was American Rap music. We hear this everywhere! Anyway… we finally left, and the owner took us back to the gondola. It is now dark and deserted at the top of the mountain as everything is closing down for the evening. He had already driven off, when we realized we had left the video camera at the restaurant. There is NO ONE around. We are about to give up and just go home, when we decide to see if we can communicate with the gondola operators what has happened. Unbelievably, we are successful. We know the word for camera, telephone, and Paradise (we think this is the name of the restaurant). Now how we got across that we left the camera at the restaurant I do not know. But eventually we sent Robert off in another car, down the long bumpy road at twice the speed of the first trip, with a man who spoke no English, to the wrong restaurant, then to the right restaurant and back to his waiting family at the deserted mountain top. Well… our celebration was a little more eventful than we thought.
